How and Why to Blog — Next Session April 13th

How and Why to Blog (and Twitter and Facebook and LinkedIn)
April 13th, 8:30-11:30 am @ Interact Studio

The world has changed. The way we communicate as organizations and individuals will never be the same. So what do you do about it?

You recognize that you have a tremendous power to create and distribute content. And that’s what this class is all about. Class topics will include:

  • How to get started with social media
  • How to write effectively for the  online world
  • How generate consistent content
  • How you can use new media tools to reach your real-world goals.

And we’re not going to do this in a hands-off, academic fashion. By the end of the three-hour class, you’re going to have a working personal blog, integrated with Twitter and any other online presence you might have or want to set up.

Most importantly, this class includes two kinds of support and follow-up. First, Patrick will work with you to develop a content strategy and plan so you don’t run out of things to write about. Second, he will provide technical support for the month after the class so that minor technical issues won’t get in your way. Because, once you are comfortable, all of this stuff is fun, easy and empowering.

Class Requirements:

You need an email account and a device you can use to send e-mail and browse the web. A Blackberry or iPhone will do just fine. A laptop is even better.

Registration
Use Code ‘earlybird’ before March 22nd for $50 off.

Register for How and Why to Blog (and Facebook and Twitter and LinkedIn) in Charlotte, NC  on Eventbrite

About Patrick:

Patrick is an award-winning advertising Creative Director and novelist. His podcast, the Seanachai (theseanachai.com) has been used as a case study in “Podcasting for Dummies” and “Tips and Tricks of the Podcasting Masters.” His work has been repeatedly featured and recommended in the iTunes music store and newsletter.

Patrick has used all aspects of new media to build a devoted following for his novel How to Succeed in Evil. Currently, over 30,000 chapters of the free audiobook version of the novel are downloaded every month.

Going all Old Testament on the Language

Judges 12:6 Then said they unto him, Say now Shibboleth: and he said Sibboleth: for he could not frame to pronounce [it] right. Then they took him, and slew him at the passages of Jordan: and there fell at that time of the Ephraimites forty and two thousand.

This is the oldest example that I know of where the the quality of a person’s language is used to single them out. And as strange and bloody as this passage from the Old Testament is, the use of language as an identifier, or Shibboleth, is still very much with us.

Consider what would happen to a candidate in a job interview who, in deadly earnest, said, “Lemme axe you a question.” Unless the interview is for fry cook at McDonald’s, this non-standard use of language would put a serious dent in the interviewee’s chances. It’s not worth trying to argue with this linguistic prejudice. It exists and we all have to deal with it. We are judged by the way we speak and write.

Sadly, there ain’t much rational about these kinds of judgements. You know exactly what I meant by that last sentence, but, chances are, you had an emotional reaction to my use of the word “ain’t”. To write well requires a sensitivity to these nuances of language. Ya’ll know that. In fact, most of us manage our spoken diction very well. We don’t swear in church. We don’t curse around small children.

I favor a kinder, gentler, more forgiving, New Testament approach to language. I appreciate people who are direct and clear in all of their communications, and try very hard to pay more attention to the substance of any message than the wrapping. To me, that’s the only sane way to look at business communications. In a more perfect world, that’s how I think things would be. People who spoke and wrote correctly, yet had nothing to say would be ridiculed.

But the world is not like that. In fact, I’m not sure people have changed much since Biblical times. Trip up on one of these Shibboleth terms and you probably won’t get killed. But your career might.

Posted via email from PatrickEMcLean’s Posterous

As if there weren’t enough adjectives in the ad…

George Orwell’s Six Rules For Saving the Language (and the World)

The world doesn’t make much sense to me. Or, more precisely, the sense that the world makes to others is not the sense it makes to me.

Nowhere is this more evident in the use and abuse of language. Language of any kind is a slippery, imperfect instrument at best. And if we want to get good use out of the tool of language, we should take some pains to see that our language stays in good condition.

This is George Orwell’s first point in his wonderful essay “Politics and the English Language”

Now, it is clear that the decline of a language must ultimately have political and economic causes: it is not due simply to the bad influence of this or that individual writer. But an effect can become a cause, reinforcing the original cause and producing the same effect in an intensified form, and so on indefinitely. A man may take to drink because he feels himself to be a failure, and then fail all the more completely because he drinks. It is rather the same thing that is happening to the English language. It becomes ugly and inaccurate because our thoughts are foolish, but the slovenliness of our language makes it easier for us to have foolish thoughts. The point is that the process is reversible. Modern English, especially written English, is full of bad habits which spread by imitation and which can be avoided if one is willing to take the necessary trouble. If one gets rid of these habits one can think more clearly, and to think clearly is a necessary first step toward political regeneration: so that the fight against bad English is not frivolous and is not the exclusive concern of professional writers.

To be sure, this essay is a source of wonderful, practical advice for anyone who wants to use, as he puts it, ”language as an instrument for expressing and not for concealing or preventing thought.”

And to this end Orwell offers these six rules:

(i) Never use a metaphor, simile, or other figure of speech which you are used to seeing in print.

(ii) Never use a long word where a short one will do.

(iii) If it is possible to cut a word out, always cut it out.

(iv) Never use the passive where you can use the active.

(v) Never use a foreign phrase, a scientific word, or a jargon word if you can think of an everyday English equivalent.

(vi) Break any of these rules sooner than say anything outright barbarous.

But as you can see from the first quote, for George, the stakes are considerably higher than the marks on your next term paper. Or the stylistic considerations of your next memo. He points out that allowing this kind of sloppy language to advance unchecked also allows people to defend the most horrible of acts.

In our time, political speech and writing are largely the defense of the indefensible. Things like the continuance of British rule in India, the Russian purges and deportations, the dropping of the atom bombs on Japan, can indeed be defended, but only by arguments which are too brutal for most people to face, and which do not square with the professed aims of the political parties. Thus political language has to consist largely of euphemism., question-begging and sheer cloudy vagueness. Defenseless villages are bombarded from the air, the inhabitants driven out into the countryside, the cattle machine-gunned, the huts set on fire with incendiary bullets: this is called pacification. Millions of peasants are robbed of their farms and sent trudging along the roads with no more than they can carry: this is called transfer of population or rectification of frontiers. People are imprisoned for years without trial, or shot in the back of the neck or sent to die of scurvy in Arctic lumber camps: this is called elimination of unreliable elements. Such phraseology is needed if one wants to name things without calling up mental pictures of them. Consider for instance some comfortable English professor defending Russian totalitarianism. He cannot say outright, “I believe in killing off your opponents when you can get good results by doing so.” Probably, therefore, he will say something like this:

“While freely conceding that the Soviet regime exhibits certain features which the humanitarian may be inclined to deplore, we must, I think, agree that a certain curtailment of the right to political opposition is an unavoidable concomitant of transitional periods, and that the rigors which the Russian people have been called upon to undergo have been amply justified in the sphere of concrete achievement.”

We can easily come up with additions to Orwell’s 1946 list of atrocities (to both persons and language). Most obviously, the President of the United States is to receive the Nobel Peace Prize while his country is engaged in two wars. One of which he has just escalated. More generally, the United States has a “defense” budget that is 48% or almost half of the world’s combined military expenditure. Observing that offense is more costly than defense, and that the United States spends 71% more than Russia, China, Korea, Cuba, Iran, Libya, Sudan and Syria combined, one is moved, at the very least, to begin the search for a different adjective to couple with that use of the word budget. More subtly, Social Security is bankrupt. Those who place their trust in it will find no security at all.

The words democracy, socialism, freedom, patriotic, realistic, justice have each of them several different meanings which cannot be reconciled with one another. In the case of a word like democracy, not only is there no agreed definition, but the attempt to make one is resisted from all sides. It is almost universally felt that when we call a country democratic we are praising it: consequently the defenders of every kind of regime claim that it is a democracy, and fear that they might have to stop using that word if it were tied down to any one meaning. Words of this kind are often used in a consciously dishonest way. That is, the person who uses them has his own private definition, but allows his hearer to think he means something quite different.

To appreciate the timeless insight of George Orwell, you only need to remember that in Saddam Hussein’s interview with Dan Rather,  Saddam claimed that he was the democratically elected leader of  Iraq. He proudly told Mr. Rather that he had received 100% of the vote. Dan was skeptical of the percentage. But what he couldn’t do was refute Saddam’s claim. For there is no agreed definition of the word democracy.

Ideas have consequences. And insofar as each of our words is an idea in a more crystalline form, we should take care with them. Orwell understood this and argued for it with brilliance and passion in his essay “Politics and Language.”

The complete text of “Politics and the English Language” by George Orwell is available here: http://langs.eserver.org/politics-english-language.txt

Next Session 3/2/10 Charlotte North Carolina

8:30am-11:30am
Class includes:

    Three hours of lecture
    Two follow-up coaching sessions
    30 days of email support

Why I fear the iPad will disappoint.

There is a lot of hype about the iPad. I am skeptical for many reasons, but all of my fancy arguments were just trumped by an email Apple just sent me. At the very top was this:

After reading this sentence I have become afraid for Apple. It smacks of sales-ly desperation. Because if that’s the best thing that Apple can say about what’s supposed to be a game-changing product, then they are in trouble. Let’s examine why.

Carl Sandburg wrote, “The I older I get the more suspicious of adjectives I become.” This bit of marketing is a wonderful example of why you shouldn’t trust them either. In this sentence, it’s not clear that the adjectives mean anything. Let’s break it down.

One of the best ways to see if a sentence has any sense to it is to cross out all of the adjectives and adverbs and see what you are left with. If we do that with this gem we have: “Our technology in a device at a price.” Totally underwhelming. Compare this to the words Jobs used to introduce the iPhone, “a new iPod, a new phone and an Internet communicator” — all in one.

If we use this logical structure to describe the iPad it becomes, “a new iPod and an internet communicator.” But that sounds underwhelming, so somebody tried to cover it up with deceptive adjectives. If you want to argue that this is a new category of device that changes everything, I will disagree with you. But that’s not why I’m scared. I’m scared because Apple is scared. And the fear is manifest in those bullshit adjectives. If that’s the best they can do to explain why the iPad is a game changer I’m not buying it.

Posted via email from PatrickEMcLean’s Posterous

The most feared punctuation on Earth, indeed

“The Road to Hell is Paved with Adverbs”

January isn’t even over yet and I can already see that 2010 is going to be a HUGE year. One of the things that I’m very excited about is that I’m going to get spend most of my time helping people improve their writing. This is a move that’s been four years in the making and I’m excited that it’s finally here.The coolest part of this shift (for me) may be the marketing. I have been trying to explain to companies for years that marketing is no longer a matter of spin. For a person or company to market effectively value must be provided in every interaction. This value is provided by good content. When I talk about this subject I get a lot of smiles and head nods. But very few people implement. That’s what I get to do with good words (right order) http://www.goodwordsrightorder.com — I get to make great content that helps people with their writing. After all, product demonstration is the best kind of advertising.

So, in lieu of a post or a podcast, I offer to you the first of what I hope will be many e-books on writing, “The Road to Hell is Paved with Adverbs.”

Posted via email from Patrick’s posterous

How to Use an Apostrophe

As far as I am concerned, this wonderful guide from theoatmeal.com is the definitive guide to apostrophes. And by definitive I mean correct and funny enough that you will remember it.

The Pomodoro Technique for Writers

PreviewScreenSnapz001So I’ve been using something called the Pomodoro Technique to help me in my writing. It’s been nothing short of amazing. On the surface, it’s very simple. You block out 25 minutes to work, crank up a kitchen timer and only focus on that task until the timer rings. But I have found it to be Double-Plus-Advanced-Level-Zen-Productivity-Ninja-Superbest for writing. And here’s why — It defeats something psychologists call the Anxiety of Becoming.

Here’s what the creator of the Pomodoro Technique, Francisco Cirillo has to say on the subject:

For many people, time is an enemy. The anxiety triggered by “the ticking clock”, in particular  when a deadline is involved, leads to ineffective work and study behaviour which in turn elicits the tendency to procrastinate. The Pomodoro Technique was created with the aim of using time as a valuable ally to accomplish what we want to do the way we want to do it, and to empower us to continually improve our work or study processes.

That feeling of the ticking clock is the feeling that we should be further along in our writing. This anxiety has been very useful to me in my professional life. Writing ads or even brochures is like sprinting. Faster! Faster! Faster!

But a book is a marathon. Aserious article has to be a 5k. And for both, there is certainly something to be said for pacing. And limiting anxiety. For me, the anxiety gets in the way. All those thoughts of, I should be faster, I’ve got to hit this word goal,  I’ve got to make sure that these words are good enough to keep or I will fall behind and I really really suck at this are counter-productive.

As writers, I’m not sure any of those worries are within our control. Or any of a thousand other worries that beset us as we are trying to go about the business of getting words on a page. All we can really do is control our focus. And the Pomodoro technique helps me get better at that.

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